You have both agreed that it is time to get a divorce, but given both of your high-profile lives, you dread the privacy nightmare that divorce can bring. Even if you are not a high-profile couple, you may still want to guard the privacy of your divorce.

In cases where the marriage ended because one party was unfaithful, the other party might become inquisitive and start digging around trying to find evidence that proves the other’s unfaithfulness. In a situation where one or both parties are in high profile or high security occupations, it is vital that the details of the divorce – especially the financial details – are not made public. Here are some thoughts and tips for keeping the details of your divorce as confidential as possible regardless of the level of your profile.

Consider divorce mediation

In Tennessee, the Court requires divorcing couples to try to resolve their divorce through mediation. If the mediation is unsuccessful, the fight is then moved to the courtroom. If both parties can come to an agreement in advance that they will resolve the divorce in mediation, you will be able to guard your privacy. Litigated divorces are a matter of public record. Mediations are confidential. You get to decide which option you will choose.

Request that the court file your divorce documents under seal

You may request that the court seal your divorce records. However, this request is rarely granted. As we said earlier, court proceedings are public records under the Tennessee Constitution, so although it may be worth a try, don’t count on your request being granted by the Court.

Think before you consider spying on your spouse

If you have recently discovered that your spouse is being or has been unfaithful, your curiosity might get the better of you, and you might be tempted to find some proof of your spouse’s indiscretion. If you are looking for possible evidence to use against your spouse in the divorce, remember that the way the evidence is obtained could disqualify it from being admissible in court. Consider also how you would look to the judge when your snooping has been revealed. If you break the law by recording your spouse’s phone calls, hacking their email or social media accounts, or tracking their movements with GPS, the legal trouble you can make for yourself could outweigh the value of anything potentially incriminating you might find.

What do I do if my spouse is spying on me?

Start simple; change your passwords for your email, voice mail and social media accounts. Consider getting a Post Office box if you are still residing with your spouse. If you are feeling suspicious, do a sweep of your computer to look for spyware. Be mindful of the contents of your email communications. If your spouse’s attorney issues a subpoena for your electronic accounts, what you thought you were communicating privately will become public.

You should consider taking a break from social media while the divorce is going on, but do not delete posts and images. This is considered “spoliation” of evidence, not to mention a violation of the automatic injunctions that issue in every Tennessee divorce and you could be subject to sanctions, including criminal contempt of Court.

The most important step you can take is to work with an experienced Nashville divorce attorney who will advise you about every aspect of your divorce. At Miller Upshaw Family Law, we aggressively protect your interests and guide you toward making decisions today that will help you in the future.

At Miller Upshaw Family Law, PLLC, your interests are our priority. We are committed to serving the people of Nashville by offering professional family law services. You are encouraged to call us at 615-391-4200 or contact us to reserve an in-person or video consultation with an experienced attorney right away.